I woke up this morning and freaked out a little bit. Today is the first day of answering to no one else but myself with regards to work and in my mind all I saw was:
"News Flash - You don't know what you're doing!"
Yikes. Super scary stuff.
I think the most frightening thing about it is waking up to an entirely blank canvas. Ha, I know, how original of me to use an artistic analogy. But seriously guys, sometimes staring at a blank canvas trying to come up with the subject matter is the hardest part of creating a masterpiece. So of course, I did the only thing I could think of this morning and stalled.
I made the bed, took the dogs out, made myself breakfast, cleaned up the kitchen and took out the trash. I even talked to my dad. There is literally nothing left to do but get on with it.
By the sound of things you would think that I'm standing in front of a firing squad blindfolded. I know how ridiculous it all sounds in my head, and regaling you with it right now doesn't make it sound much better. I'm reminded of something that Mike once said to me when I was vacillating over the decision to quit and whether I would be successful or not: "You won't know, until you try". Well I'm gonna give 'em the brass.
wait, is that even a saying? It's possible that I might have just made that up.
I just need to focus. I won't know anything until I know the basics of my ability to produce product and how fast I can do it. I also need to organize myself and create a cataloging system that will not take up huge amounts of my time. I think after a week I can start to get an idea of how to allot my time during the day and adjust from there as I go.
Okay. I can do this.
Rip the band-aid off, Nichole.